"Untitled story" ? unfinished...

　

　

misty dreams, foggy dew, smell of forests, morning campfire smoke, I awoke and the sun blinked twice and smiled and opened its golden mouth and said, "Hello there son how are you, i biiiid you GOOD day...." but then i looked away and looked back, and the sun vanished like a time lapsed ahead, and the moon was angry and said "you must be punished" and i did look at my watch realize the hands on my clock were faces. the
watch on my wrist turned into a small garden snake and moved about me, slithering down
my arm and onto the grass.
I stood up i felt devoured by the trees but at the same time i felt calm
by the breeze and the ever changing skies. I felt peace here but only for a moment
this must be my birth, i know i lived to see it for a million cycles now, 68 days, 68 years
in a reality I have unheard of this has all now changed but I felt like the envy of man inside this strange land because nobody could understand something quite as real as nature. time seemed but the differences of time here is night and day seems so fast your rarely sleep but still feel alert to carry on but some people would naturally die because the time process ages you and when your days are shorter time seems to zoom, essentially what i am saying is life disappears before your eyes if you don't keep your guard up but not that you really can prevent anything from happening you can only prepare yourself.
think of it this way, you know how some people say they wish they could
watch their lives flash before their eyes, well here you can watch time literally grow and watch your physical changes by day because day would equal a year and another three days is another three years. one interesting thing is you can remember your birth because
time and days were short you could literally touch your dreams because it seemed like dreams that were passing not staying although eventually you age so fast the memories become blurs and the mind turns to insanity as form of only release or as sign of explanation. I woke up in this forest, i feel i been here before, i still smell the trees, the air is delicious i can smell hamburgers on a barbeque or ribs with a tangy sauce smells just moving and swaying me side to side. reminds me of when i went camping with my mom and of course my dad when he was around, he left my mom he had a drinking problem and got abusive, i heard them fight a lot, and i heard a lot of crying and i felt i couldn't do nothing ... that was two days ago, i was 10 , I am 12 now but I can still sort of piece together my life as I wander through this unknown forest trying to figure out just how I would up here in the first place. Keeping on the trails following the line of path not to stray off though there were very few trails to tread upon in such a forest such as this. I had to hurry before sundown or another year will leap, i had to get to somebody before it was too late. it was 3:40 in the afternoon, the sun was still very bright but it was going down in about 6 it would start to go, by the time i wake up tomorrow I could be in a different place, whos to say i will be here tomorrow? I need to know how I got here today.I was aware i was aging but what i wasnt aware why I was here. I found a shack up ahead it was old and beaten and it looked like it had been abandoned for quite some time, the door was small but round the shack almost looked like a tiny outhouse, it was mahogany and the top roof was a dirty blue very rough-edged, the carpenter who made this house must have been on something, like a drug or something, but who is to say that I am not on something? i still could not grasp why the moon spoke to me with such anger. I made a bed in the shack out of newspapers i had found from a damp moldy box in the corner, it had a stench of death which lingered in a way that not too many things do. in other words the smell could repel or render someone sick. although no matter how bad the box, the old grubby shack still seemed to be more of a safety net then the rainy doleful outdoors. as the rain fell as the night turned to day I sat under a sheet one newspaper which covered the top of my head, i could not begin to think, i did not want tomorrow to come, i needed today, today was my only chance, tomorrow i will be thirteen years old, I feel like i am still hallucinating but I can't tell if its that or time is lapsing. I feel like i am being munipulated by gears, gears that chain me to my death. I ripped the newspaper off my face and sit up straight on the shakey wood floor, the floor felt like it was shaking more than usual. I got up, checked around, took in what i could and concluded i am going mad, i need to find my home. The boy inside me wanting to go home. home? then it became apparent, maybe my parents are looking for me, maybe if i leave they will stand a better chance of finding me? but with al this rain tumbling down its seemed that they would most likely not be searching. Running down the trail , my heart racing with desire to find my parents, i felt 12 going back 4 days i was younger, that child is still apart of me but as of tomorrow march 13th i will be a teenager but somewhere else. Running, running i fall face flat in the pile of mud. my body facing down, diagonal all twisted up like a flailing contortionist on the dirt road,
2
morning settled around though I had only received very little sleep for how very little time I got before I woke. it seemed to have drained the damn life force out of me because that morning I never experienced so much disorientation, and it did not help I could not see the full view or the road because head was baring down in the ground, it seemed to shade and avoid all other ojects surrounding me and it made me feel more engulfed. Every day begins this way, same as was the day before and that same pepetual doom that I feel from experiencing my life in days should scare me but it doesn't, doctors who tried to rationalize it can't even give my "disease" a name. All these thoughts overloading each circuit i tried to forget the past and work past getting my head off the ground i felt chain bound until I saw a light filling the black gaps of my life as I saw reality restored. Everything felt unclear in the dark and in the dark the mind can create many dangerous or many wonderful awe inspiring images. the mind doesn't fail un-noticed in the dark, in fact the mind becomes the centre of attraction. Its the law of the darkness. Though it was here in the darkness I felt most secure and it made wonder if death/letting go as hard as holding on? and is holding on to all this running all this running and aging, the stress and confusion surrounding my whereabouts and the whereabouts of my parents. I got off the ground looked around the the road, felt the sun still hitting me like the thumb of god crushing me.